Good, Bad and the Naughty

My PhD student in Social Welfare at UCLA has formally started today. Had a really tiring, tedious, but informative day. Met some prestigious professors in the field. Talked too much in English. I have problems of switching from English to Chinese now.

Although my title of this post is rather exciting, it's so not my status right now. I'm totally wore out. I try to keep some spirits. But when I read the syllabus of 245A, I was all overwhelmed again. For god's sakes, I just made some peace with myself by telling myself "Don't freak out." Now, it starts all over again! I doubt if I am able to survive for the fall quarter, coz only for this course alone I have about 50MB large of reading, and all these readings are mainly philosophy and epistemology! I don't even know the Chinese meaning of these terminology, how can I have any idea about them, for god's sakes.

I should believe that I can survive and finally get the hell out the grad school. Stuart, our PhD program director said he's sure we will be finished on time. I really wanna get the hell out the ivory tower. I am sick of sitting in front of a computer, writing! This was what I was thinking during the orientation. Oops, mind did slip... I had too much education.

But anyway, I shall appreciate such an opportunity. PhD is a lifestyle, which I keep talking to myself, in order to persuade myself. Nah, I am so gullible. Since I decide to pursue a job in academia, I would like to stay in this program, coz they seriously train PhD students as expertise in the field and they care about the post-PhD period of job hunting. I am a Burin now, though I do not like to be a bear...

I felt desperate to speak Chinese this evening after the orientation finished. But when I was talking on the cell with BS, the woman sitting in front me on the bus yelled at me... -.- She thought I was too loud on the phone. C'mon! Only American people are loud... Am I becoming one of them already???!!!

However, I cannot get any thoughts down to write in Chinese now... So sad.

The lib job I got is a rather boring work... but it's gonna cover part of my living expence. In this sense, Lynn, make peace with it.

Ta-Da~ My PhD life finally comes along. People, let's be excited about it!